5 Things I Learned From Getting Rejected By Two Organizations

Feb 3

By Judy Lee ‘17

“Thank you so much for participating in our program, unfortunately we are unable to offer you a position in our organization this semester.”

Cue self-loathing and re-reading my rejection letters 5 times each. It’s hard to deal with the doubt that creeps into your head and combat the emptiness of not feeling like you belong. To be completely honest: I was broken up about it for the rest of day—it was a double whammy and I couldn’t deal.

Here’s the thing:

1. Literally no one cares.

Of course, to you, it’s now the worst day ever (or something to that effect). Yeah, your friends are gonna give you the “Wow. I’m sorry, dude.” You feel ashamed and dull. But you know what? After that…

N o o n e c a r e s.

They’re going to be sad for you for maybe 5 minutes…10 minutes, tops. But if they’re your real friends, they know it’s not what will define you. If they do let it define you, consider new friendship options.

Even the people in the organization won’t care. Everyone will move on in a flash. It’s really only you left to get over it. Harsh, but true and somewhat comforting to realize.

2. It’s not a reflection of how poorly you did, but how well your peers did.

This part was really difficult: at some point, I needed to stop beating myself up over my own perceived inadequacy. Growing up with those voices in my head, this was ever something I ever labeled emotionally “damaging”. But when you start tohate who you are and stop looking at how far you’ve come, it’s time to patch up the wounds.

Chancesare: you were surrounded by incredible people (ESPECIALLY at USC, the school ofchampions). That by no means makes you a small fish in a pond. You’re a big fish. You’re just in a really, really, REALLY big pond.

Take a moment to appreciate that the people around you are just as ambitious as you. How terrible would it be to be the best at everything because no one else is really trying?

3. Appreciate the strong emotions you’re feeling right now and turn them into something productive.

We’ve all been in this place of self-doubt at least once. Those who haven’t are either lying, or aren’t reaching high enough.

Thought you were really good at being a leader? Take the initiative and join another organization that supports you! Start a new personal project of your own.

Do something that will incorporate everything you think made you stand out from others and develop that. Don’t let those traits go to waste! Be productive, be powerful, and strive every day to be the best you.

4. Take this as a “start fresh” card and take a break to appreciate yourself.

Sometimes feeding your soul isn’t enough. Get your body in on that, too!

Chipotle? Yes. In-N-Out? Hell yes. Got a thing for EVK’s country fried steak?

…um, well. Okay, yeah. Go for it!

Love morning runs? Gear up for the weekend. Lay on the floor listening to your favorite song and feel the sunlight warm your eyelids. Reflect in the Museum of Contemporary Art or surround yourself with the beautiful sights of The Getty Villa. Hike Runyon Canyon, jump into the waters of Santa Monica beach.

After all—no commitments, no problem, right? If you’re bad at this “living out loud” stuff like I am, take this as the last indication that you need to stop making excuses.

5. Try, try again…or not!

A practical point: now you know what the process is like so next time, you have an advantage. This makes you more confident, less anxious, and focused on what you want out of yourself and the experience as a whole. You are wiser. Isn’t that amazing in itself?

And if you happen to decide that the process and/or the organization wasn’t for you, then cool! It’s one more thing you know about yourself.

Remember that losses don’t make you a loser. You are a fresh, young Trojan and you are resilient.